the aftermath
People write about how it hurts to lose a friend but no one ever tells us that maybe life took away someone dear to us to teach us something. Maybe losing them would help us find ourselves again.
The aftermath of every broken friendship is continual blaming, victimizing yourself and anxiety. Look back at when you lost a friend, when you lost someone who meant the world to you. What did you do to improve yourself? Comfort food, junk eating, trying to distract your thoughts, blaming the universe and cursing your life and even cursing the person. What good did it do to you?
Yes, it is important to feel, to cry when the world seems to collapse. But what is more important is to have hope, hope for a better future, hope for something magical, hope for yourself and specially hope for that person. It will not come easily. It takes hours, days and sometimes even weeks to understand where you might have gone wrong. But it is equally important to be in the other person’s shoes and to know where it pinches. It is equally important to realize that even when life seems cruel, it is trying to teach us something important and make us ready for the things that are yet to come.
the ruining
So what was it life was whispering in your ears when you were screaming in pain? What was it that it was trying to remind you when you were lost in your own memories?
When your mom unknowingly made pizza and cake the next day, it whispered to you that there are people who care about you and that these are the people you sometimes hurt the most and who hurt you. But that does not mean that they stop caring, that they stop wishing you well and that they stop praying for you and your happiness.
When your friends called you the next day and comforted you by bad mouthing the person who supposedly hurt you and you couldn’t do anything but defend them, life whispered-if you are still defending them then does that mean you were at fault too? What makes you defend someone who you thought you had started hating? Is that your own guilt? Your own guilt of saying somethings you wish you could have taken back?
But we are so busy thinking that we can never be at fault, we are so busy victimizing ourselves, so busy shouting into the void that we forget to listen to life. Instead of seeing the bright side (even though it feels like there isn’t one), instead of interrogating what we might have done, instead of understanding the other persons side, we decide to be sad. We decide to ruin ourselves.
the lesson
Better late than never. You might have not realized what you did. But it is not too late.
The lesson here is to think, to spend some time with yourselves, and to find your lost self. The lesson is to feel the guilt, the pain.And on realizing your mistake, you would want to beg for forgiveness, but you are not ready. Not yet. But you will be. One day when you wake up and don’t repeat the same mistakes, when you realize that you can be wrong too and when you have finally found the person who you once used to be. When you find the innocent and naïve side of yours, which is pure and understanding. When your brain has accepted what happened and has overcome its flaws. This is when you are ready for forgiveness. And when you are truly changed, you will be forgiven.
To err is human. But to realize your errors and work hard to improve them is to be a good human.
Who do you strive to be?
Nebula 